Make My Day

Me, walking out of the bedroom, freshly showered and dressed in my normal t-shirt, cargo shorts and sneakers. I go for a cup of coffee and the Wife looks up from the paper.

Wife: What do you have on? Is that a new t-shirt? (she normally asks me multiple questions like this and I normally answer only one)

Me: No.

Wife: It looks good. I like that color on you, it brings out your blue eyes.

Me: Thank you. And I go over and give her a kiss, a smile and go back to pouring my coffee.

Wife: No really, you need to get more shirts that color. You look good.

Me: Walk back over to her, give her another kiss and said..... You just made my day.

Wife: Well that was easy.


Yeah, so what, I'm easy.

Weekend Idiots

I had a couple of opportunities this weekend of being a mouthy butch. I normally have a ton of patience but when someone pushes my buttons when I'm wearing a don't fck with me attitude, I have no problems saying what's on my mind.

Friday night and we're out with our friends at an Italian Mom/Pop type restaurant. We've all been there before several times, the last was with the Wife and that was when we had our first bad waitressing experience. Back to Friday night, we got the same fcking waitress. After we had gotten our rounds of drinks the Wife asked for a glass of water and at the same time we asked for more bread sticks. Fifteen minutes later the shithead waitress walks pass our table and I asked again for the Wife's water. She then proceeded to tell me I have to wait my turn that she was going to another table to get their order because they were waiting. Well Fuck Me and the horse that I road in on, her tip just dropped from, cha-ching!, 20 to 15%. She got the table's order then stopped at our's and announced to us she had other tables to wait on and......I thought fck this shit, and I told her Listen, we go out to dinner a lot and we DON'T need to hear about how busy you are...she ran away and quickly brought back a glass of water for the Wife to which I simply said, "humph, no lemon" she ran away again. Cha-ching....10%. Three minutes later she snottily placed a picture of water on the table containing one little slice of lemon. As she walked away, I said where I would like to put that pitcher. Ten minutes later she and her helper were delivering our food as she was putting the pizza in front of me and I said, you forgot our salads AGAIN (she had done the same in our last visit there). Cha-ching.....5%. She had a moment of looking very flustered and then she blamed her "new" helper to which I reminded her that she was the waitress and was the one responsible for taking care of this table and then the rest of the table told the new helper it wasn't her fault. We got our salads with the meal which to me isn't a big thing other than if I wanted to eat everything at the same time, I would have made the meal myself at home. The food, the beers and the company was great.
Check time and she fucked that up by not including a discount. When we finally walked out of the place the tip was down to the token buck on the table as in a fuck you buck! We never got the breadsticks.


Come Saturday morning the Wife and I were shopping at Homo Depot and at some point I had to take a trip into the Ladies Room. My attire was the usual cargo shorts, t-shirt, sneakers (since it's fall time here, no more flip flops) and a Bar Harbor, Maine ball cap. One lady was just finishing up and leaving as I walked in and went into one of the stalls. When I was washing my hands my back was to the door, I heard the door open and a woman walked in then said 'oopppps!!"and she hesitantly walked in. I thought, oh fuck as I continued washing my hands, then I started laughing to myself but loud enough for her to hear it as she was walking to the stall. Then I said, "Yes, this is the Ladies Room!" As I was opening the door to leave, she was still standing in front of the stall staring at me at which point I said "Ladies Room, right?" and walked out. I mean give me a fckn break, it's Homo Depot!

Don't mess with me when I have zippo patience for idiots.

Sunday, we stayed home.

Strip Poker Anyone?

Have a Great Weekend Everyone and whatever you do, don't get caught....unless of course you want too. ;)

Cheers Queers!

You Want Me to Do What??

Peeing in a little plastic cup is just not right.

After the Lab Tech (not the cute Dyke one either) finished labeling the yellow screw top clear plastic cup, she handed it to me with a snickering smile on her face and told me she needed a urine sample. I returned her smile with my "you are a sadistic bitch" smile, turned and headed into the bathroom.

I've relieved myself in all sorts of places and conditions...behind bushes, trees, rocks, I even left my mark in a Brazilian rain forest. I've used Lucky Lady (another story to tell) in row boats, canoes and kayaks. I've used the standing, WTF is this hole in the ground, in 3rd world countries. And there were many times on the long commute home I would park the Jeep at just the right angle off of Rt.80 and use the door as my privacy wall. I thought I was a pee pro, until yesterday when I had to pee into a 2 inch wide cup.

Ok, so in the BATroom I unscrewed the top and got the tiny container in the proper? place and well, I couldn't go. Tried again, yea something but wait, I'm hearing it fall into the toilet water? WTF? stop everything! Checked the cup, nothing. Sigh. Repositioned, tried again, ok going and oh crap! my fingers are getting wet! This sucks! But I did finally get something into the fucking little cup. I screwed on the lid, cleaned up the outside of the cup and my hands and I deposited it in the little secret hiding place and OMG there's somebody else's cup with bright orange pee, get me the FUCK out of here! It just wasn't right.

If there's a next time, I'm going to punch the snickering smiling bitch, take the cup, go outside and find a tree or rock. I'll probably do a lot better.

What Would Harvey Do?

Well, Maine has NOT been added to the list of states where gays and lesbians are treated equally. The voters in Maine voted against the law that their Legislature passed and their governor signed. The law allowing marriage equality never had any effect in Maine. The Anti-Gays made sure of that yesterday.
We're still waiting for the final count on Washington state decision on domestic partnership. This isn't even about marriage yet the rights of a minority is being voted on. Right now we have a slight edge over the Anti-Gays but the counting is still going on and it could go either way, keep your fingers crossed.
New Jersey had hopes for getting marriage equality but that has be sent back a decade because of the election of an Anti-Gay governor.
Yeah for the city of Houston for electing a lesbian mayor and for Kalamazoo for passing a non-discrimination ordinance. We'll take these steps forward.

Four states now have marriage equality. Massachusetts in 2004, followed by Vermont, Connecticut and Iowa. And beginning in January 2010, New Hampshire will be added to the list. And the 18,000 gays and lesbians that were married in the few months that California had some good sense until the passage of Prop 8, are still considered married. My Wife and I are proud members of that privileged group.
The latest fucktard movement in California is keeping your child home on Harvey Milk Day. The Governor signed the Harvey Milk Day bill into law and the Anti-Gays are freaking out about it. Yes, lets make our LGBT students comfortable in their classrooms.

So should we feel hurt, or more unequal, or more dehumanized, more hated or think less of ourselves because of some of yesterdays voting outcomes showed a little over 50% of the voting people are afraid of us? Afraid of our "homo.sex.u.al" agenda? Or our radical ways? NO, we shouldn't because we know better. We will keep on fighting in our peaceful and loving ways because we will eventually win this battle.
The Olson/Boies Prop 8 case is going to the U.S. Supreme Court and is currently schedule to begin on January 11th. The Anti-Gay group, Protect Marriage is working on pushing the trial out through their appeals of the judge's order to turn over their internal documents from the Yes On 8 campaign. Not only are the Anti-Gays dragging their feet to get the trial started but it appears they also have something to hide.

Marriage Equality in the U.S. is going to happen and until it does I want ANY Anti-Gay couple who are deciding on getting married to first get permission to do so from a Gay or Lesbian. I mean, it's only fair, right?

Listen Up Zig

Let me tell you something about your other Mother, she doesn't like you going into her purse.

The idea you had last night of taking her prescription sunglasses out of her purse was a bad one. I know you were only trying to clean them for her and having to chew through the case to get to the glasses was the only way. Understanding your little nose didn't know how to open the glasses up so you could clean the other side of the lens didn't mean that you had to bend the arms all which ways. Even I was afraid to look at the damage you did.

So you know you are on the Wife's shit list and yes, you belong in the dog house. Your cuteness will only carry you so far, I know that one myself. Hang in there little buddy, she'll get over it soon. I'll do my best to help but promise me one thing, you won't fuck with my stuff O.K.?

Harley's Little Shadow

Whenever it's quiet in the house, I usually can find these two together....

on the couch...

on my Dad's bed....

at the end of the deck...

being sun buddies...

and sometimes they let "the other one" join them...

My 12 paws. Harley, Ziggy and tuna hole (aka Mikey).